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Indio, California: I am going to state - right up front - there may be a few comments/quotes/words/photos in this column that could offend My Readers. The words do not come from me. I am only reporting things I heard/saw/read in Las Vegas this weekend. (Note: I did not say "Vatican City"... I said "Las Vegas".) If you are easily upset, please look away and come back tomorrow when this blog will return to the usual boring stuff. Otherwise, relax.

Our drive from Las Vegas to Indio yesterday was horrid - in 90° heat. We drove the Interstates. Terrible traffic. Thousands of hung-over bummed-up UCLA fans driving back to Los Angeles clogging the freeway. Not only was traffic slow, we stopped at a diner and service was painfully slow. Our server kept reassuring us our food would be out very soon. It's a pancake. How long can it take??? Apparently 45 minutes. We were about ready to return to the Honda and forage off stale mints in the glove box, when our food  appeared. A 4.5 hour drive took over six hours. We were happy to return to our quiet RV paradise.

DT and I enjoyed a perfectly normal Monday at our campsite in the Motorcoach Country Club. We worked, we exercised, ran errands and enjoyed the 80-degree sunshine. Such a change from our three hot wicked days in Las Vegas.

This is normal in Las Vegas. These blokes flew-in (non-stop-by-the-way) from London for a bachelor party. The guy in all-pink (with white flip-flops!) is the groom. I am not sure if he lost a bet or if this was just his planned ensemble for Saturday. He invited me to his wedding in a castle in Italy. Such a bummer that I am already booked for that day and will not be able to attend.

The off-color quotes on my blog tonight are all from cardboard signs of beggars and "entrepreneurs" encountered on the Las Vegas Strip. Naturally, you are going to see the Please Help sign, in front of a homeless person. Of course, you are going to see the Why Lie? I need a beer sign. But how about this one? Family Killed by Ninjas. Need Karate Lessons. You have to admit, this warrior has some smarts. And some issues.

Not everyone is begging. Some people are willing to work for a hand-out. We saw a man with a sign reading, Kick Me in the Balls, $20. Kick Me in the Ass, $10... and another street person offered, Insults, $1. Bad Advice, $2.

Yes, there is a lot of depravity in Sin City... but the best story I heard all weekend was from a lady working in an office with a co-worker who can only type by looking at the keyboard and pecking with her two index fingers. (This poor soul even hits CAPS LOCK to capitalize a single letter.) Their office has old-school keyboards, so as a prank, they switched-out a few keys... like the "A" for the "S", etc. The poor pecker could not figure-out how she was making so many typos. Even after they explained the joke to her.

Back to Indio and our perfectly normal day.

One of my favorite food writers (Deb Perelman, of Smitten Kitchen) posted a margarita recipe a few weeks ago starring Blood Orange Juice. I did not have Blood Oranges (they are over in the desert), but I did have tangelos, so that is what I used in the recipe. Very nice, very refreshing and a great complement to the "taco bowls" I served for dinner tonight, featuring my Lentil Taco Filling (made in the rice cooker).

Instead of putting everything in a tortilla, I just put everything - shredded cabbage, lentil taco filling, tomatoes, avocados, cilantro, radishes, jalapeno slices and salsa - in a bowl. Vegan. Easy. Super inexpensive. Delicious.

Until my next update, I remain, your "I can type with my eyes closed" correspondent.

LET'S MOVE IN MARCH! I have challenged y'all to get out there, lace up your sneakers and walk or jog (or the exercise of your choice) at least 30 minutes - five or six days a week in March. I'm doing this for charity and my prominent backside. 

After walking-only for three days while in Las Vegas, I ran four miles today - walking occasionally to see if there was any pain in my knee. (Strange thing - my knee does not hurt when I run, only when I finish my run and walk, and when I go down stairs - not up stairs). Very little/hardly-any pain during/after my jog today! I was careful to ice the knee for thirty minutes after running and thirty minutes before bedtime. Hopefully this whole ordeal is behind me and I can continue to pound-out the (super slow) miles in March. How's it going for you? Please comment below. 

Pedometer: 14,479 
Miles jogged for the day/month: 4/54

RV PARK:  Motorcoach Country Club - The Crown Jewel of Motorcoach Resorts. 400 sites, three pools, three spas, fitness center, golf, bocce ball, tennis, 2-mile waterway, fine-dining restaurant, bar, security, planned activities, perfectly maintained. Sites for sale or rent.